It was the day motherhood became a reality for me…I gave birth to my first-born son.
At first, I couldn’t believe that everything was happening for real and the time I had long been waiting for had finally arrived.
The moment I first heard the cry of my little one, I knew my life would never be the same again. At the first sight of him, it felt as if we were the only two people inside that room. Tears of joy were forming in my eyes and my heart was so filled with love. I finally got my gift!
My husband and I struggled to get pregnant for years. I have a thyroid condition. It is possible for me to conceive but it will definitely be difficult. One year into our marriage, I suffered a miscarriage. Never in my life did I ever feel so brokenhearted at the loss of my unborn child.
And years after that, my husband and I tried and tried to have a child… but I never conceived. There were times when our lovemaking became too functional — that we NEED to do it because we WANTED a baby so badly. Every month I would get my monthly period, I would lock myself up inside the bathroom and cry for hours. Whenever I would see a pregnant woman or somebody else’s baby, it always felt like life was so unfair. It was a tough time for me and my husband. But our love for each other grew stronger as we held on to one another for strength and comfort.
I didn’t want to blame God but sometimes I would. There were times when I simply could not believe how He could allow some women to get pregnant only to have them abort them or abandon their gift of life. While there I was, longing so much to be a mother, yet God wouldn’t give me the miracle I was hoping for.
But God continued to assure me that my moment will come in His own perfect time.
And indeed, my surprise blessing came after 4 years of waiting!
When I first held my newborn son in my arms, time stood still. For a moment it seemed like I was holding him so close to my heart and I was afraid to let go. It all seemed like a dream and I didn’t want to wake up. All those painful years I went through waiting for him was definitely worth it. I knew that very instant that this wonderful miracle I was holding would change my life forever.
The day I gave birth, I was given a new life to nourish and a new life to live. I embraced my new role as a mother. It’s definitely not going to be an easy task. But life with my son will be a new journey I am looking forward to experiencing together with my husband. Motherhood is indeed a wonderful gift and every new life is indeed a miracle!